If you’ve ever asked this question you would know that it leads to a dead-end.
Dwelling on why keeps us stuck on what we believe ‘should’ have happened…it keeps us stuck in the past…it keeps us powerless and small.
If, like me, your life hasn’t ‘gone to plan,’ you too have probably wondered “Why me?” as you’ve tried to make sense of change, pain and loss. The problem with asking “Why me?” is that there’s often no rhyme or reason as to why things happen to us. Even when there is, asking “Why me?” doesn’t allow us to move on or to find happiness.
Holding on too tightly to a pre-determined ‘version’ of our life keeps us stuck, unhappy and unable to see new opportunities as they arise.
Step 3 in the Happiness Today series is about releasing. This step is about releasing our grip on the ‘story of our lives’ and making the hard decision to give up asking the question that is most damaging to our health and happiness; “Why me?”
Accepting that life is unpredictable and often takes us down unexpected paths, is no easy task. It is necessary, however, if we want to experience more peace and happiness in our lives. Alternatively, we waste precious energy and time trying to get life to ‘conform’ in ways it simply doesn’t…and never has.
The only thing we can control in our lives is our attitude and response to the things that happen to us.
While we can’t ‘script’ our lives, we can commit to a set of values and a life-perspective that will allow us to move through life with less angst and more inner stability.
When I reached this step in my journey, I knew I had to release my attachment to the ‘old Jess’ and all that I could do and achieve when I was 100% healthy. I had to release my attachment to the way I thought my life would pan out, and instead I chose a new life-perspective and set of values.
My new life-perspective was the decision to live well, no matter what my capacity was or wasn’t. Committing to self-awareness, to listening to my body, taking care of my physical and mental wellbeing, and living with gratitude formed my new set of values.
Deciding to release my hold on what ‘should’ have been, my life began to change and evolve in a more positive direction.To read more of my story you can click through to my previous blog post, where I shared why it’s important to never to give up.
Are you ready to release the ideas and perspectives that are keeping you stuck and unhappy?
- What has happened in your life that wasn’t what you’d hoped or planned for?
- Do you blame yourself for what happened? Can you release any blame you might still hold towards yourself?
- Are you ready to stop asking “Why me?” and start asking “What can I make of this situation?”
- What values do you want to take through with you into the future, no matter what is happening in your life?
Next week I will continue to look at releasing and how we can find more happiness and peace by letting go of the stress and tension in our bodies and minds. Until then, have a great week and I look forward to hearing from you.
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xxx Jess xxx